Sunday, January 20, 2008

Have you ever met someone like this?!?

We had my SIL staying with us until she ended up being hospitalized. She is Bi-Polar. She doesn't want to accept her diagnosis, therefore she chooses to "self-medicate". . . meaning, she takes it whenever she feels like it. Unfortunately, with her illness she NEEDS to stay on the meds on a regular basis. We took her in for a short period of time, because her roommate accused her of assault and swore out a warrant. I took her to the Magistrate to get processed and they released her on her own recognizance. Her brother & I were concerned that if she stayed with the roommate until the court date, that there may be other problems.

We have decided that we will NEVER do that again. We have tried for years to get people to understand that she needs weekly observation in order to ensure that she takes her meds on time and regularly. She also needs a counselor with whom she can confide in about her anger and deep emotional issues. Well, that all came to a head on Wednesday, 23rd. She apparently really showed herself.

My mother was home when it all happened and my MIL was here visiting and making us dinner (her way of thanking us for stepping in). . . apparently while my MIL was in the kitchen preparing dinner, my SIL came storming in our front door from her walk and my mom asked her how her walk was on such a beautiful day. . . her mom, my MIL, also said "Yeah, its a beautiful day for a walk & you must have walked 2 miles". . . well, that set her off and she started ranting and screaming at my MIL and cursing, getting up in her face. My mom was flabergasted. After about 3 minutes, the phone rang and it was one of my SIL friends & she completely changed her attitude. . . was calm, gentle, very polite & spoke with her for a couple of minutes. . .

THEN as soon as she hung up, she turned around and started back in on her mom. . . well that did it for my mom.

Thankfully, I had warned her about these outbursts that she would have with her mom and my mom was better prepared. . . if she thinks you are afraid of her, then she will really play on that. . .but my mom is a firecracker and she didn't put up with it. She flat out told her to sit down and shut up and that she was NOT going to listen to her talk to her own mother that way! my SIL tried to ignore my mom, but when you get my mom upset, there is NO WAY you can ignore her! She got her attention and my SIL sat down & shut up. My mom just told her how it was.

My husband came home and was able to talk with her calmly for 45 minutes. She CHOSE to act that way with her mom, but she knew better than to act that way toward her with my husband home. . . remember, "conscience decision"!?!

Now, she's in the hospital & has been TDO'd and I have no idea when she is getting out. She has called us a few times and rants about how she feels betrayed & tries to lay the blame on someone else other than herself. Having worked with the mentally ill in a group home setting as a "trainer", I am very familiar with what is REALLY part of their illness and what is a CONSCIENCE decision on their part. . . Her mean, hateful, beligerant attitude is simply a decision NOT "part of her illness". I have seen what the right medication can do and what counseling can do. . . but as long as she doesn't believe that she is Bi-Polar, then she will continue to go through these Manic episodes.

I can't stand how she treats people when she gets angry or ticked off at them OR when she doesn't get her way. She acts more like a 4 year old and not a 42 year old. . . NO, that's not true. . .my 4 year old doesn't act THAT bad!!!

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